Sunday, May 01, 2005

Bowling With The Frog Princess

As I refuse to do anything even remotely useful on Sundays, I decided to go bowling with the Frog Princess and Ivan the Terrible today.

I typically bowl quite horribly, but today I was slightly less horrible than usual.
My first game: 57
My second game: 110
My third game: 97
If you add them together, I get a top score of 264, which is really professional-level, if I do say so myself. However, the important thing is really that I bowled in a very stylish manner.

I've been trying to be specially careful about my psychological health these days, so I also made sure to order two extra-gooey slices of cheese pizza with a whopping big cola at the bowling alley. Then we went shopping for books and adorable shoes.

It's really important that I participate in uplifting activities like these, because it is really a terribly depressing shame that I'm not incredibly wealthy with hordes of Man Slaves at my beck and call. The fact that I'm not lolling around in a hammock every day, being fed peeled grapes, and later flying off to Barbados with gorgeous models could seriously damage my emotional well-being if I let it. In fact, there could be serious psychological consequences of dwelling too much on my lack of a gourmet chef, multi-million dollar art collection, an on-call masseuse, a castle in Scotland and my very own petting zoo. So I self-medicate with bowling, books and shoes.

13 Comments:

Anonymous Rhodent said...

LOL... I'm sure you had fun entertaining the troops!

11:28 PM  
Anonymous Vile File said...

One's own petting zoo! What a super idea! I'm saving up my pocket-money for one now!

11:29 PM  
Anonymous Weary Hag said...

It's refreshing to see that someone in our society is looking after their mental health for once. I swear, in about 20 years, we're going to be a society of the healthiest and most physically fit mental cases on earth. All these totally buff people will be walking around talking to traffic cones and mailboxes and wondering where they went wrong in their lives.
Good for you to indulge in your favorite mind candy

11:29 PM  
Anonymous mark said...

Excellent! I bowl rather horribly myself and take great pride when I can say that the ball stayed in my lane 75% of the time and I really swell with pride if no one was maimed during the outing.

As for the petting zoo... I like to walk down to the center of the city where there is a rather large petting zoo of tame rats and quite nimble cockroaches that don't mind being petted, as long as you offer them something in return, like a pizza, stale biscuits, or your youngest child.

Think I will follow your lead and do something for my own personal mental health... Hmm, I see they have a sale on chainsaws, oh the possibilities, the possibilities...

11:29 PM  
Anonymous amanda said...

you poor dear

11:29 PM  
Anonymous Green Eyed Lady said...

Glad U had fun. My older daughter "aims" for the lowest score, laughing all the while

11:30 PM  
Anonymous carol said...

Bowling...there's somehting I haven't done in quite some time. Good suggestion.

Hmm, now I'm dwelling on those lacks as well.

11:30 PM  
Anonymous sarah said...

I adore your approach to psychological health.

11:30 PM  
Anonymous april said...

yes, it was great fun, wasn't it? now if i can get to that book i bought, at least the cute purse is getting lots of use

11:31 PM  
Anonymous frally said...

Y'know what would be great for my psychological health? Marrying Johnny Depp. As that's not going to happen anytime soon, I'll just have to stick to being a crazy mofo.

Good bowling scores! You must've been using the technique I demonstrated on my blog recently.

11:31 PM  
Anonymous Larry Jones said...

Do you think you're ready for hordes of Man Slaves? It's not all peeled grapes and deep massages, you know. It's a serious responsibility. They get restless and anxious, and each one needs to be cared for as much as any thorougbred, and made to feel appreciated. Maybe you should start off with just one...

11:31 PM  
Anonymous Dayna said...

57 !!! *LOL*

11:32 PM  
Blogger L said...

Yes, a very good time was had by all!

I hope everyone follows my example and tries to do things to look after their emotional health... you just can't be too careful these days.

11:32 PM  

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