Sunday, April 10, 2005

Ooh, What A Line!

My friend the tickgirl was in town last night, so we popped on over to a couple of the local "meat markets" to go trolling a bit.

I had a married Turkish jeweler named Ghengis try to pick me up. His general line ran something like this: "Darling, you are the most beautiful woman here, and I say this from the bottom of my heart, darling. I've been everywhere-- Sweden, Australia, London-- and you are one of the most beautiful, darling. Do you understand that I say this from the bottom of my heart? And my wife, I love her, do you understand? Darling, can we be friends? And friends can call each other, do you understand? Darling, if I gave you a plane ticket to New York, as friends, you could stay in one room and I could stay in the other, as friends, do you understand darling? So, can I call you?"

I almost sprained my face from laughing so hard.


Blogger sarahfisch said...

Your blog is extremely funny. Good luck amongst the (armed) pod people.

6:24 PM  
Blogger pete said...

how do you sprain your face? I think I'm going to say that a lot now

2:49 AM  
Blogger kingfelix said...

well, you can't blame anyone for trying. i have a turkish flirting story, my friend went to the Pontics with a black friend, and a Turkish man came and started hitting on them. at one point, he turned to the black woman and said,

"you are the chocolate lady, and i am the sexy goat"

the moral - you got off lightly

10:25 AM  
Blogger L said...

okay, "you are the chocolate lady, and i am the sexy goat" definitely wins, hands down.

9:36 PM  
Blogger portuguesa nova said...

Rico Suave....

10:38 PM  
Blogger Kosh Naranek said...

Man, I'm sorry I missed that. That's what I get for staying home and watching HGTV.

10:58 AM  
Anonymous theomorph said...

No doubt thinks he's a real smooth operator, too.

9:47 PM  
Anonymous happy and blue said...

So when do you leave for New York?

9:47 PM  
Anonymous april said...

hehe ...

9:47 PM  
Anonymous mark said...

I'm thinking the guy had grossly underestimated the intelligence of American women or he had a bad case of stupidity...maybe both?

9:48 PM  
Anonymous carol said...

Darling, did you give him a fake number, or just not give him one at all? :)

9:48 PM  
Anonymous weary hag said...

I would have clocked him at the second "darling."

9:48 PM  
Blogger L said...

theomorph: he thought very highly of himself... another quote "even though I own a $150,000 car I am humble, very humble... I always park it in the back I am so humble..."

happy and blue: I thought you would never ask

mark: I think he overestimated the stupidity of the American woman

Carol: I definitely gave him a fake number!

weary hag: ordinarily this would have pissed me off, but he was SO over the top, like a Saturday Night Live character, that we were HIGHLY entertained

9:48 PM  
Anonymous green-eyed lady said...

Darling, so entertaining-hehe

9:49 PM  

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