Monday, July 03, 2006

I'm Back

I am blogging again after a horridly loathsome month of deadlines, stress and non-fruitful apartment hunting.

Additionally, there has been an abominable lack of champagne, beefcake and yachting trips, a deplorable situation that has left me rather indisposed, subject to headaches, vexation and woe.

This, of course, has also led to sporadic attacks of exaggeration, but we are soldiering on, nonetheless.

To-day I am languishing over the lack of a suitably charming new apartment to rent. My current abode simply will not do, as the landlord is increasing the rent to an ungodly sum, and the lease stipulates "no pets"-- especially no goggle-eyed chihuahuas, and most especially no de-scented skunks, both of which I am considering as suitable pet options from a mental health perspective.

In order to procrastinate on budgeting and future house-hunting, I have been wandering aimlessly with various inappropriate acquaintances and watching terrible films filled with cheesy explosions, rubber monster suits, technicolor smoke, and concerned-looking scientists who run around with yellow plastic suits and head implants.
"the monsters look cute when you look at them from this angle!"
"the city's been invaded by Godzilla!"
"in order to build the scientific civilisation, we need to sacrifice some lives!"

Incidentally, I have also been toying with various possible new slogans for Random_Speak, courtesy of this Advertising Slogan Generator. I just don't know which one speaks to me the most

"Happiness is a Cigar Called Random_speak."
"The Random_speak Goes Straight to your Head."
"Got a Random_speak? You're in Luck."
"Better Living Through Random_speak."
"Feel The Raw Naked Random_speak Of The Road."
"Can You Tell Random_speak From Butter?"
"Random_speak Tested, Mother Approved."
"Bet You Can't Eat Random_speak."
"Be Young, Have Fun, Drink Random_speak."

hat tip to Pharyngula for the link

* the next post will be a real one, I swear

** I seem to have an ungodly number of comments. I shall commence reading and responding


Blogger roselle said...

good to see you back and blogging! you've been missed!

5:57 PM  
Blogger Ron Southern said...

Navy talk: I've got your Randon_speak dangling!"

What a girl, though; suffering from vexation. I expect you to have the vapors next! Keep yourself polished; such brightness should last!

10:03 PM  
Anonymous tim said...

We've missed ya baby, I was just wondering yesterday where you'd gone :-)

6:06 PM  
Blogger glomgold said...

I've been told the de-scented skunk's a good way to go. The teller was not a skunk owner however.
The butter/random_speak comparison is quite nice but nothing holds a candle to a slogan which contains Nikola Tesla in it.

9:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You say in your profile that one of your interests is cheese. This would seem to be a rather broad topic. I am not clear whether your interest is in the details of manufacture, the various types for sale or simply in the consumption of cheeses.

I suggest that we will make no real progress until this outstanding issue is addressed.

Corporal Tickle 4th Bombast Regiment, the Yorkshire Fusiliers (retired)

11:30 AM  
Blogger L said...

actractiva: thank you :)

ron: I may possibly have also been suffering from the vapors. Also, melancholia.

Tim: that is so sweet :)

Glomgold: yes, I think I shall keep my current slogan. After all, he did have the amazing creativity to die in a room full of pigeons :)

Corporal Tickle: ha ha ha ha! My interest in cheese is, of course, confined strictly to the consumption of said product.

9:46 PM  

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