Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Lingering Dread and Ruinous Vexation, Books, and Fun With Bloggers

I've been thinking of writing a poem about my feelings this week; what rhymes with "melancholy laziness and occasional madness?"

Just joking! Ha ha! I really need a rhyme for "lingering dread and ruinous vexation"!

Anyway, I've been de-stressing by reading a lovely biography of Nikola Tesla, the eccentric genius with whom I've fallen madly in love, even though he's been dead for simply ages. I've also taken the time to read a riveting book about famous con men and courtesans, which helpfully informs me that the excessive use of cosmetics containing lead will cause ghastly skin diseases, and that the fabulous Gaby Deslys coined the scandalous phrase: "the King and I are just good friends." Tee hee.

I've also taken the time to seriously go over all our lovely memories together, Dear Readers. Of course, I'm sure no one minds Suitable Embellishments, just in case I decide to publish my memoirs and have Oprah nominate me for her book club so I can earn millions and millions of dollars.


Tim, do you ever think about that time we put together that demo cd for Gangsta Records? You didn't think we could ever sell our sound, and I said "Yes we can", then you said "No we can't", then I said "Dammit! Yes we can!", but then it turned out you were right after all? Oh well. I hope you were able to sell all the gold teeth and fur coats we bought...

April, remember when we hitchhiked to Alaska with just a pocket full of hope and twenty dollars to spend the summer canning fish to earn money for college? Those were the days! You used to stress out over the snow, all that boring tundra, and having to wear mukluk boots every day-- but we knew it would be worth it, didn't we? And we'll always have stories of spear-fishing under the Northern Lights and harvesting whale-blubber with Tuuquuk.

Brett, I'll never forget that crazy night we got together with old classmates and headed to Vegas! Man, was that drunken Elvis impersonator crazy, or what? I'm sorry I lost all your rent money on blackjack, but it was just a phase I was going through. And I hope there's no hard feelings over that prank at the Liberace Museum. We were really just kidding.

Jim, just what were we thinking when we blew everyone off and stole a VW to drive to Amsterdam that time? Wasn't it poetic? I remember we smoked until three in the morning, and you were explaining your views on Parliamentarianism and Nietzsche, but I just wanted to play chess and make out instead. I sure learned a lot on that trip, but I wish I could remember what it was. Please write and let me know.

Lisa, was it you or was it me who first suggested that we run away to join the circus? I suppose it doesn't matter now, but didn't we have the time of our lives? The lions, the ponies, the excited crowds, the siamese twins and tightrope walkers.... You fell in love with that sword swallower from Reno, and I briefly dated that French contortionist with the blue eyes -- but it's our friendship and the dinner parties with clowns that I'll always remember.

Happy&Blue, remember when we took your parakeet, Frankie, to that bird fancier's show in Toronto and he won first place after whistling "Oh My Darling Clementine" while flying through a series of flaming hoops? I still can't believe it! And then he pooped on the Prime Minister's head and we got cited for inciting a public riot. I guess no one's perfect. At least we remembered the camera and cookies!

My Dear Professor, what on earth possessed us travel to Italy with a busload of refugees? You were so dapper in your three-piece suit and panama hat-- giving nightly lectures on fine port, Cuban cigars and the writings of Samual Clemens. Of course, I always understood that your espionage work came first, but did you have to rush off in the middle of the opera like that? It was most disconcerting, and of course they never refunded the ticket!

Mariana, do you ever tell people about that time we barely escaped from that restaurant fire in Lisbon? It's still hard to believe that it actually happened and we survived to tell the tale! It's really too bad you ruined that fabulous purse when we jumped out the the fourth floor window, but at least you didn't get smoke inhalation as badly as I did-- I'm still coughing. Luckily, we managed to finish that bottle of champagne before escaping.

Mr. Anigans
and Glomgold-- I hope you guys don't regret that time a group of us borrowed ten thousand dollars to create our own low-budget kung fu movie. Oh sure, you both broke an arm trying that "double one-legged grasshopper" move, and I wrenched my shoulder while adjusting wires for the grand finale with exploding demons and flying ninjas-- but you can't put a price tag on good cinema, can you? Besides, you never know when we'll recoup our losses on dvd....

Chickie, I'll never forget the time you suggested we get matching tattoos to commemorate our emergency relief work in Kenya. After the drought, the locusts, the tse tse flies, boughts of malaria and Lassa fever, picking ants out of our oatmeal, sunburns, mysterious bruises, deadly snakes, and mistranslations-- that made it all worthwile.


Okay, I'm exhausted, and there are so many fond memories of everyone to share!

I'll add a few more in my next post

*by the way, I have added some of you as new links and moved all my links to drop down boxes on the side. If I've accidentally missed you, let me know so I can add you there


Anonymous tim said...

You're so fabulous :-)

1:13 PM  
Anonymous Professor Twain said...

Making your list made my day.

For our next trip, the espionage work has been cancelled. I have replaced the lost income with royalties from the solo classical banjo album that I released.

6:20 PM  
Blogger L said...

Tim: thank you! It really is too bad that we couldn't sell our sound, though, isn't it?

My Dear Professor: I would totally buy your solo classical banjo album :)

2:37 PM  
Blogger Chickie said...

I must confess that I ate your ants after you flicked them outta your oatmeal. Extra protein, you know?

10:41 PM  
Blogger Chickie said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

10:41 PM  
Blogger L said...

chickie: every little bit helps :o

8:46 PM  
Blogger glomgold said...

I read a Tesla biography when I was younger, "Man Out of Time" or something similar. I have been a tremendous fan ever since. Plus I've recently been told there's an autobiography of his out there! Strangely I did not gain an ounce of admiration for Trump after reading his biography at that same time...

7:55 PM  

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