Sunday, February 10, 2008

back to blogging and a trip to the flea market

I'm back from an extended blogging break, although I'm sure that only my mother is reading this after an absence of several months. Hi Mom!!!

Contrary to popular speculation, I did not run away to join the circus or die spectacularly in shark-infested waters off the coast of Africa while evading pirates. I've just been swamped with puttering around my new house, acquiring a boyfriend, having my neck crunched by drunken sailors, eating cheese and buying useful things at flea markets.

For example, a flea market is the only place you can purchase a "Gold Packs of Flavor Wrapping Paper", which states: "This wrapping paper the assortment is numerous, and the species assorts with the popular vogue synchronous, the applicability of low file product in rarious senior high school is expensive sufler the large businessman to like!" The ingredients are listed as: "As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live. My friend! I will never erase the memory of you from my mind please remember me now and then." I can't wait to use it.

Luckily, I was also able to purchase a plastic "Natural Health Care Product Out Of Plant", which was accompanied by a plastic "bath massage thing", which strongly assured me that the "vegetable Sponge has the efficacy of disinfecting. Eliminate itch, beatifying and protecting skin, as well as strengthening health and invigorating brains. Soft and comfortable. A bath with vegetable sponge. Can eliminate filth and grease, promote metabolism of skin. Long use can serve to care all kinds of skin diseases." So, yeah, my leprosy and softening brain are almost cured.

As an emergency backup, I also purchased a "Magnetic Darts Safe Funny" which is very colorful and seems to involve toxic plastic and various photos of aliens wrestling midget Godzillas. Additionally, as the manufacturers helpfully inform me, the "Magnetic Dartboard is a toy which is very safe and full of fun. Normal dartboard using a very sharp dart. It is very dangerous and could hurt people if used in-properly. So it is not a good toy for children. However, our magnetic dartboard does not have such problem. Our mangentic dartboard use a strong magenton dart to replace the sharp tip." Which is great advice and really quite useful, as I could poke an eye out or kill someone otherwise.

So, Mom, if you're lucky I might post tomorrow too!

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Blogger Ordinary Girl said...

Wow! Welcome back!

I'm disappointed you didn't join the circus though.

8:07 PM  
Blogger L said...

yeah, me too :) just decided to take a break for while with all the stuff I was doing....

10:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Neck crunching, aye lassie, an if you did not have you're head in an inconvenient location the neck wouldnae been in any danger....
Pity we did not have the honor of your company at the later fettivities

4:22 PM  
Blogger L said...

ha ha ha ha! is that you Floyd? AAAARRRR!!!! I'll stay later next time :)

7:58 PM  
Blogger Comfort Addict said...

You're back! Yeah!!

Seriously, I'm glad for the new boyfriend and new house (you'd be surprised how often these occur together). Blog when you can but, most of all, enjoy your life.

7:17 PM  
Blogger L said...

comfort addict: I will definitely enjoy my life, but will also try to blog ;)

5:11 PM  
Anonymous kate said...

Actually, my friend bought some Flavor Wrapping Pager at the dollar store. They have tons of it there, no need to visit the flea market.

9:43 PM  
Blogger glomgold said...

Welcome back! (I am back too)
Sounds like you ventured to the far reaches of the barely- intelligible-english quarters of the Orient. And hit up their flea markets. Good show!

12:10 AM  

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