La La La.... Stormy Weather.... La La La

I think the monsoon season has begun again, although drizzle is better than sizzle, I always say. Friendly cockroaches are parading two by two into everyone's houses, my current hairstyle is "nuevo afro", people are glowering at the sky, and even my brain is damp. However, no one is frying eggs on sidewalks, at least this week.

As I languish decoratively at my computer desk, I'm admiring the soggy scenery and thinking ahead to-- you guessed it!-- Hurricane Season, which is every Floridian's favorite time of year.

In fact, I am already thinking ahead in quite a responsible manner, taking stock, looking pensive and making a plan:

My Hurricane Season Preparedness Guide

1. Move
(I briefly considered moving to South Dakota, but then I remembered their lack of charming tapas eateries. Instead, I am moving to a "non-evacuation" zone in St. Petersburg)

2. Buy tons of bottled water and cookies, in case of emergency
(You just can't be too careful these days)

3. Buy duct tape to cover windows
(This actually does no good whatsoever. However, it really is quite the fashionable thing to do)

4. Buy tons of canned goods to donate to worthy causes after Hurricane Season ends
(Unfortunately, I still have last year's canned peas staring grimly at me)

5. Fill bathtub with clean water
("They" always say to fill the bathtub with clean water in case of emergency. I suppose I shall just have to take a nice relaxing bubble bath)

6. Buy oodles of batteries
(I do this every year, but then I can't find them, or they're the wrong size or something)

7. Buy charming rain slickers
(In several colors, of course, to match a variety of little outfits. One must not sacrifice fashion for practicality)

8. Place all important documents in a watertight container
(As soon as I can find them, I will)

9. Learn to make even-numbered lists

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P.S. Did you know that I am now #2 on Google when you search for fuzzy drumsticks?